The Greatest Commercial Ever Made

“Everything is awesome. Everything is cool when you’re part of a team. Everything is awesome, when we’re living our dream.” I am sure the Marketing Execs at Lego have been singing those lyrics every day since “The Lego Movie” was released on February 7th. My children and I went to see the film this holiday weekend and even though we all thought the movie was AWESOME I was more impressive by the movies branding message. As a content and native entertainment executive I was amazed at how organic and seamless the story incorporated the product without it feeling like an advertisement for toys. It was simply entertaining, and I would place it as the greatest branded entertainment movie of all TIME, and a model – excuse the pun- for the future.

Behind The Scenes- LEGO Movie

Advertising execs and content publishers should see this movie as a prototype of how to answer a brief or RFP for branded entertainment concepts. What makes this portrayal so effective is because it takes all of Legos brand positioning and issues and addresses them over 1 hour and 40 minutes. We can only wish that all commercials could be this entertaining while providing such organic messaging.

I am sure the meeting with the writers went down like this: sure we want a Lego Movie but you need to understand our needs and our audience. We have two types of customers we want to reach: those who build exactly what’s on the box and those who create their own projects and internal inspirations. The demographics are mainly children but we also have nostalgic adults who enjoy playing with models and toys. That group also includes fanboys who enjoy our licensed products. Our brand positioning is that we encourage creative play while installing a passion for building and architecture. Got all that? Ok writers and Warner Brothers Entertainment go make me a commercial… I mean movie!

The best part of the film is that it has an actual plot that could be followed by children and adults alike. Not once did I have to answer one of my kids usual “what’s going on?” questions. Of course that is probably due in some part that I watch PG13 superhero comic book fan boy films with them on a regular basis which perturbs their mother. The second best part is that the moral of the story coincides directly with Lego’s brand positioning centered on creative play and playing together. It took all of our strength not to travel to the late night Toys R Us in Times Square and buy a bunch of Lego build sets after the film let out. We decided to simply sing the theme song by Sarah and Tegan at the top of our lungs instead.

Is this the greatest branded entertainment movie of all time? Is this the best use of product placement that I have seen? I will expand upon that in a lengthier paper but my initial answer is yes. At $147 million in ticket receipts on a minuscule $60 million budget in 2 weeks it is on it’s way to challenging other formidable fare like Transformers, The original Pirates of the Caribbean, and the first two Toy Story movies. It has already crushed or is about to crush both GI Joe movies, Battleship, Kit Kittredge, The Watch, The Internship and the Smurf movies (can anyone explain to me how these movies are popular overseas? I don’t want to take food out of Neil Patrick Harris mouth, but these films are awful). In the end the only true competitors for G.O.A.T are the Transformers movies, The Pirates franchise and the final Toy Story installment. I’m immediately excluding The Pirates franchise because even though the first film was spectacular and it made my son obsessed with swords I don’t think he or most children ever made the direct link between Captain Jack Sparrow and a ride at Disney Land. He hasn’t asked for a trip as yet thank goodness. Next is Transformers. Ignoring the fact that the original Transformers had a decent story line while the following two were panned by critics these Michael Bay wonders have made a boatload of money and has encouraged the sales of a truckload of toys. The original Transformers film made $709 million worldwide and spawned two sequels with another one on the way with an entirely new cast as Shia LeBoef is no longer famous. What makes me lean more towards The Lego movie in this competition is that The Lego movie is loved by critics and fans alike with an 8.5 IMDB score and 96% critics score. Transformers, despite its gaggle of viewers and kids and adults rewatching them on cable and bluray the film has never been entirely loved by critics or fans even with its 57% critics rating and 7.2 IMDB score. The following two rake in more cash but the stories get worse, as do their ratings. And we will not even touch upon the hints of racist stereotypes in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. But I guess these films are not made for critics but 8-16 year old boys whose tastes for fine storytelling are suspect at best. And if Hasbro is ok with the story lines- they did green light Battleship- then who am I to judge?

This just leaves Toy Story and it’s remarkable franchise. They basically started it all with the original film released in 1995. It landed Pixar on the entertainment map and causes a lot if Mr. Potatoes heads and Barbies to get sold. (Look up numbers). The third installment sold over $1 Billion worldwide and all three movies are loved by critics and audiences alike. So for now I am going to wait and see where Lego movie lands at the end of its run. But I think it will make a strong case as the G.O.A.T. with it’s great story, catchy tune, cheap production costs, and hypnotic messaging to make me and my kids to go directly to the store and purchase Lego. Thank goodness for all of us they waited until after Christmas to spring this on us. Or was that part of their genius plan to make us spend out of season with the DVD arriving just in time for Christmas. Yes, they are definitely awesome and my champion!

Is Superman vs Batman destined to fail?

First there was Man of Steel, which raked in a ton of cash. People seemed to love this film world wide. People raved about the performances and the action/fight scenes. I, unfortunately, was not one of those people. I enjoyed the first 45 minutes of origin story (even with Kevin Costner as his father) but could do without:

1. Lois Lane and poor Amy Adams being wasted in a vapid role
2. A weak villain in General Zod which featured a usually potent Michael Shannon
3. What seemed like a 2 hour fight scene that destroyed a city and killed millions of innocent people just for the sake of doing it
4. And the controversial (SPOILER ALERT)
“Kill scene”. Yes I know, Superman killed Zod and his henchman in Superman 2. Just not so violently and abrupt.

I was not remotely shocked that a sequel was announced so quickly. I mean it’s not like it was “Green Lantern” bad with that franchise killer Ryan Reynolds. It was much better than that, but I was hoping that now that they got the origin/Jesus story out of the way we could get something really good in the works. And then it happened, they said that Batman, the greatest hero in the DC universe fresh off his reign of box office dominance would swoop in with his cowl and provide some extra heft. I was so excited I almost peed myself when I heard the news. Like the women who read “Fifty Shades of Grey” and were waiting for who would be cast as Christian the Dominatrix I waited for my Batman to be cast. And like the women of Fifty Shades hero worship fan club I was extremely disappointed in the choice. BEN AFFLECK!? The man who ruined Daredevil and by association Elektra. He is the new Dark Knight? Don’t get me wrong I love Mr Affleck as a director. I watch all of his stuff. Shoot, let him direct Superman vs Batman- well as long as it’s set in Boston. Hell, he is a fellow Leo in the astrological chart… Two days apart… I have to root for him. But the Dark Knight? And right after the announcement that trash of a movie – Runner Runner – was released, I threw up in my mouth.

I even wrote all my tweets with #nodisrespecttobenaffleck hash tag for weeks in my one man protest. My man Red Guardian tried to calm me down and told me that I should not prejudge. That people went bananas when Heath Ledger was cast as The Joker and Jennifer Lawrence was cast as Katniss and we all saw how that turned out. So after some meditation, alcohol and breathing exercises I decided to give the franchise another chance.

So yesterday they announced that Wonder Woman was cast and it was the amazingly hot Israeli model/actress Gal Gadot who got the iconic role. WTF? Sure she is exotic looking, but uhhhmmm, she isn’t built like an amazon. Yes, she can hit the gym like the dudes do or Linda Hamilton did when they get chosen for these roles. But Gadot is not the greatest of actresses. She is serviceable and never getting an Oscar nomination. Of course the same was said if Halle Berry early in her career – BAPS anyone- and we see how that turned out. (Don’t get me started on Halle Berry as Storm, that’s a three hour podcast in the making). Plus, Linda Hamilton was a very good actress who buried herself in the T2 movie. It was a fabulous performance that probably made it difficult for her to get cast in other projects because she so embodied that role. The theme thus far for Superman vs Batman is to cast fair to middle of the road actors for these roles and hope people don’t notice. Well I noticed Keanu Reeves wooden acting by Matrix 2 and I will notice the same wood in SvsB. So as far as I’m concerned these people running DC are just content in doing an “English Breakfast” on all of us fans. Screw ’em because they will come out anyway is their thought process. How selfish is that. Capitalism at its best. Let them eat cake. Why provide quality when I can push this defective crap on them?

So to all those who loved the original, Man of Steel, congrats on making it ok for the studio to continue to jerk us around. And to all of those wait and see people, I have only one thing to say about your flawed logic: Heath Ledger and Jennifer Lawrence are actually good actors. Same with Christian Bale and Anne Hathaway. That can make up for any other deficiencies (looks, eye color, body type) that they may have. You can’t teach speed or height, but you can cover it up with actual talent.

So as DC tries to run the Avengers game plan to lead into a Justice League movie, they will ruin it by casting people who can’t act in these important roles and use CGI to cover the holes. Well I guess it worked for Michael Bay and Transformers. What the hell do I know, I just watch these films.

Trailer Vision: Sabotage

I enjoyed The Expendables. I also enjoyed Red. I like ensemble movies which takes my favorite stars from the 80s and 90s and brings them all together for a fun shoot-em-up. These actors seem like they are having as much fun making them as we have watching them. That’s the feeling I’m getting from Arnold Schwarzenegger return film, “Sabotage”. Sure he was in both Expendables, Escape with “Rocky” and that cop movie at the border, “The Last Stand”, but that was only an appetizer to a true Terminator/Predator comeback.

<a href="” title=”Sabotage Trailer”>

The trailer shows that Arnold is getting good advice from someone and that he is not carrying this movie by himself. His stiff acting can no longer be outweighed by his amazing physical physique. He is older, a half step slower and Father Time has caught up with him. In other words he is no longer Conan the Barbarian. But like Stallone before him he has created a shoot em up and hired a number of B level actors with muscle and attitude to balance out the roster. We get the woman from “The Killing” and “World War Z”, Mireille Enos; The Alpha Wolf from True Blood, Joe Mangabiello; Best Man’s Holiday and Iron Man’s Terrence Howard; and wanna be action star from the Titans movies, Sam Worthington. None are A list movie stars by themselves but as a group I can definitely be entertained.

They represent a DEA team/family that like The Wolverine are the best at what they do, and what they do is take down drug cartels. They are so good that they take down a huge money score of over a $100 million and someone on the team skimmed $10 million of it. The “original” aspect to the movie is that someone on the team not only stole the money, but is also killing the other team members to get away with it. So there are drugs, guns, action, betrayal, and a murder who done it. And I hate to jump on the Fast and the Furious bandwagon, but it is a weird take on family within high stakes.

Usually with movies like this you need a great villain: T1000, Predator, some great Bond bad-guy named Goldfinger, Dr. Evil, but with this movie its like “Scream” and it’s a fake hero that is the bad guy. So no maniacal laughs, no taking over the world, but a team member that just wants $10 million. So as long as it’s got a lot of action, guns and trash talk this movie cannot be ruined by a weak villain like in Contraband, Homeland, or Thor 2. So in the end I have to recommend this movie as a definite popcorn chomper. I will see this in the theatre and get a big box of popcorn and enjoy the action star ride. Can’t wait!

Kirk vs Kirk

Lets start with the answer to the first question of how was Star Trek: Into the Darkness. I thought it was awesome. JJ Abrams has reintroduced this film for old and new fans alike. It is probably the best Star Trek movie since “Wrath of Khan”. Many people will give you their thoughts on the film and IMAX 3D, but what I want to do is figure out who is Dukie, meaning whose really the shit. That is who is the best Captain Kirk. One caveat, I have always loved William Shatner as James T. Kirk. To me he will always be THE Captain of the Enterprise and go boldly where no one has gone before. Yes, some people love Captain Jean-Luc Picard and feel like he is superior than Kirk and they are entitled to their opinion. He is a fine actor and plays a great Charles Xavier, but he can only follow and not surpass the original Captain. And no, Scott Bakula, is not allowed in this discussion even though he was quite good in Enterprise and I will always love him for Quantum Leap, but not so much for Major League 3. But I digress. Focus, Jim, focus. William Shatner created and established the great cowboy, explorer persona that we all love in our Captain. And he created the quirks and audio staccato that has been both revered and spoofed by generations of Trekkies. William Shatner is by all means the original Kirk. So I went into this competition of Kirk vs Kirk – William Shatner vs Chris Pine a little bit biased. I also knew that my bias was also based on the fact that Shatner had been sitting in the captain’s chair for a considerably longer time than Pine. So in order to square that away I would need to even the score some. Actually I might have given advantage to Pine by only comparing Kirk to Kirk in the first two movies. But then after consideration I realized I was giving Shatner handcuffs with Star Trek the Motion Picture and decided to compete on their second movies only: Shatner’s “Wrath of Khan” Kirk vs. Pine’s “Into The Darkness” Kirk.

Ok. Now that we have established the forum, lets look at the criteria of rating Kirkiness. There are some things that are definite Kirkiness. Those items are: swagger, leadership, fighting, sexiness, bravery and wit. Let me tell you that after watching “Into the Darkness” it was a game changer for Chris Pine. I enjoyed the first one, but that was an establishing moment for Pine’s Kirk. This time we get to see who Kirk really is. There are some spoilers in this Celebrity Death Match so please do not read unless you have watched the movie or don’t care about spoilers.

Swagger- Noun
“A very confident and typically arrogant or aggressive gait or manner.” I think of Kirk as an intergalactic pimp. He has an energy that drips off of him. It’s something that commander Pike didn’t necessarily have. Probably the reason why he never made it out of the pilot and why they had to create the Kirk character. Of course Shatner embraced these characteristics. That’s why this competition is not truly fair. As he is so fond if quoting, “He doesn’t believe in the no-win scenario”. Pine is a handsome man and is very cocksure. He has an energy about him as well, but it is different. Pine is absolutely confident in everything he does, from being a captain to picking up women. But his swagger does not come from the same place. Due to the changes in the story line Pine’s Kirk has his swagger because he is trying to fill a hole in his life from the death of his father. A father who sacrifices his life for his birth is difficult to live up to. He doesn’t have the natural swagger of a man who had a good upbringing, but the swagger of a person with something to always prove. He is a 15 year old boy in the body of a 25 year old. Shatner’s Kirk had his father’s approval and advice growing up. George Kirk was the inspiration for Shatner’s Kirk to join Starfleet and George Kirk lives long enough to see him become captain. He wanted to show the world how great he was because he thought he was great, not because he had a chip on his shoulder. Shatner had swagger the entire film, even when he was tricked by Khan and was caught with his “britches down”. Pike also had swagger and took on missions that no other captain would want to take on his own. He was intent on going out and getting revenge on the murderer of his mentor, Captain Pike. He was not afraid to go to the Kling-on home base and did tell Khan that “He was only alive because he allowed it”. Unfortunately, he did lose some of it when his Starship was about to be destroyed and he felt like he sacrificed his entire crew to die.
Final outcome: On the issue of swagger I give that one to William Shatner.

Leadership – Noun
“capacity to lead. To direct on a course or in a direction.” Kirk is a leader of men. He gets the best out of them. In Star Trek the original series Kirk is described as being able to get the most out of his squad. Being a leader is the ability to make the tough decisions even when you are not sure what the right one is. Even though Shatner was all so human – as Saavick describes him- this human quality allowed him to be a great leader. Men wanted to and did die for him. Spock’s own death was because he believed the needs of the many outweighed the needs of the few or the one. Only his own upbringing or the lessons of the captain could engage some thinking. Even with a mind altering device in their brains Chekov and his captain couldn’t pull the trigger on Shatner. Pike continued to lead his men into danger over revenge. It took his people to continuously tell him what was morally right to stop him from making enormous mistakes. Not that Shatner was without major problems either. But that is what makes Pine’s Kirk so human as well. Revenge is a viable emotion after seeing his mentor killed. He was a new type of leader that allowed his crew to eventually teach him how to lead them.
Final verdict: I am going to give Leadership to Shatner as well.

Fighting – verb
“to contend in battle or physical combat”. We all know that Shatner had a fight and win clause in his contract. He had the same clause when he became TJ Hooker & we believe that James Caan had the same clause when he was head of security in the TV show, “Vegas”. As my daughter explained to me while watching “Wrath of Khan”- Shatner looked too old and was not ready for action. Sure he beats up his son, David, when he first gets to Genesis, but his son is soft and is a doctor/scientist, not a warrior. I hate to agree with her but Pike was young and spry and even though he gets his ass kicked by Khan he had a few great fight scenes to show what he could do. So even though Pike doesn’t win his big fight, he does do some good fighting on the enemy ship – not as good as Khan or Spock – to earn the win on this one.

Sexiness- noun
“The arousal of sexual desire”. William Shatner is at a severe disadvantage due to his age again. Young Shatner is a stud. Wrath’s Shatner is 50 years old. Sure Carol Marcus still thought he was sexy and I’m sure that his wavy hair was a turn-on for many older women, but Chris Pine is 33 years old when “Into the Darkness” is released. That’s a lot of years difference and hard to do a head to head comparison. Also the outfits are not made to look sexy but distinguished as the crew was older.
Final verdict: I’m just going to give this one to Pine in a walk off.

Bravery- adjective
” having or showing courage”. This is the toughest one. Both Shatner and Pine are brave beyond belief. Shatner continuously offers himself up for the safety of his crew. He tells Khan that if he really wants him, Khan needs to meet him on Genesis. Pine also puts himself at the forefront of danger at every possible situation. His Kirk is not afraid to die and has shown that numerous times. He is like an extreme athlete who pushes the limit constantly. Shatner wants to live. He continuously tries to cheat death and pat himself on the back when he does. That is why he fixed the computer in Kobayashi Maru scenario. He can’t even face death in a simulation. In the end though Pine gets the opportunity to risk everything to save his ship and earth. He too tricked the Kobayashi Maru scenario, but he did it because he was a rascal not due to his fear if death. He wanted to get over on Spock’s simulation. When the true moment arrives, he gives the ultimate sacrifice similar to Spock in Wrath of Khan to save the crew. Shatner never even considers this option. Pine embraces the motto: “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one.”
Final verdict: “Damn it, I have to give this one to Pine, too.”

Wit – noun
“the ability to relate seemingly disparate things so as to illuminate or amuse”. Shatner wins this one easily. Dude is just funny in real life so he brings this to his role. Pine isn’t funny, he is more smug. People want to be around Shatner and have a drink with him and tell stories. With Pine they more or less tolerate him because he is handsome and aggressive like Gaston in Beauty and the Beast.

In the end Chris Pine is a very good Captain Kirk. His bravery and sexiness are amazing. Shatner is the original and his leadership and swagger are second to none. In the end though Shatner is the original and as my friend Prodigy says “it takes a full knockout to take out the champ. You cant win on points alone.” For that Shatner is the best Kirk. Come back to me after Pine does his third film, I might change my mind.

Yo Joe

I finally got to see GI Joe on Sunday night. I wish I had been drinking beforehand to make it a real party but my friend Keisha is on this health kick to get into her beach body and drinking alone in the theatre is very Tony Stark.

Let me start by saying that just like the 4 year old kid who was at the 11pm showing with us there are a lot of spoilers in this monologue. So if you care about plot points being ruined do not read anymore. And yes there was a 4 year old child at the 11pm Sunday night movie with us and she was LOUD.

First point is that I hated the first GI Joe. I hated the plot, Dennis Quaid, Marlon Wayans and everything except for Magic Mike and the Baroness who reminded me of Sarah Palin in Black Leather. You betcha, we all have weird fetishes. So it was going to take a game changer to get me to come out for a sequel to a movie I didn’t care for in the first place. And that game changer is 6’4 and 245 lbs of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. I will watch almost anything he is in now because at least like “the spaniard” I know that I will be entertained. Dwayne has become larger than life and I am down with what the Rock is cooking. Whole reason i saw Fast Five and am anticipating Fast Six. I was also intrigued by the buddy movie concept that could be explored by Mr. Tatum aka Magic Mike aka 21 Jump Street. Well Mr. Johnson put his People’s Elbow into this stew but alas someone thought it would be a good idea to kill off Magic Mike. What the?… I kept thinking he would come back later. I even stayed to the end of the credits for a surprise return. But NO, Duke is dispatched from the film 15 minutes in. Just long enough for us to care about the bromance but not long enough for it to truly blossom.

As for the rest of the film… it is by the numbers. We get the team together. We track down the bad guys. We have a twist that allows our outnumbered heroes pull off a switch. We have wise cracks from Bruce Willis and we have Tara from Friday Night Lights show off her Megan Fox appeal. Yes this movie could have been that other Hasbro franchise Transformers and I wouldn’t have been able to tell the difference. But they have a formula and it makes money and sequels so who am I to argue with success.

The one thing I could have done without was The Rza as Blind Master. He was beyond awful. He was the Jza Jza Binks of this film. He was a complete clown I’m this movie… And not in a good way. I thought I was watching out takes from an old Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle cartoon but nope he was still in Retaliation. Yes he is a talented music producer but as an actor and director he needs to quit. It looked like he prepared for the role by watching Kung Fu Flix marathons on Fox Five from the 80s and took only the worst ideas. He was deplorable and I hope he didn’t get his SAG card for this “performance”.

So in the end would I recommend this movie? In these hard times where movies are used as a release from reality this movie fit the bill. But it would have been even better if I had that other release from reality… Alcohol.. while watching it for it to be a true party.